Monday, November 14, 2011

no-ah strikes again

He opens the door, "I have something for you Beach." 
Form upstairs I say jokingly, "It better not be another animal."
There is an awkward pause.   
"Busted!" he says.
Oh you have got to be shitting me?!?!

Let's recap some of the events here on the farm.  Me with my two kids met Him with his one kid and some of us fell in love.  So the 5 of us got one dog and one Baby.  We got a cat and a hamster but the cat ate the hamster and they both left unceremoniously. We had an owl for 23 minutes on a Halloween night.  Then we moved to a farm got 2 chickens and one cat.  Then we got more chickens becasue chickens beget chickens, some turnkeys (chickens are gateway animals to harder birds), some g. pigs, 2 more cats, there were rabbits, did I mention the Rabbits? The white dog that wasn't. A snake, some birds (the other kind), then there was that time with the scorpion.  A few lizards and toads, water striders, and fish including the resurrection zombie fish and the Rat (RIP).  The mean as sin Goose. You can't forget the skunks or Big Red the squirrel.  Oh man and that duck we found.  Then the Wesley pigeons turned up and now this.  [I'm not even sure I listed them all!]

It is adding up.  Yesterday I was running the new little dog missing the big black dog (RIP Kilo) remembering the time Kilo was chased by a deer and out of nowhere a red tail hawk swooped in from behind knocking the leash out of my hand.  I don't think she wanted to eat my little dog.  I think she thought my dog was a fox and she wanted my dog to go away, so we did.  Not too long ago I ran over a snake while trying to not kill a squirrel, was chased by a chipmunk out at Topaz, and harassed by a spider while skinny dipping at Baker. 

I'm sending a note out to the universe: Please no more animals encounters until Spring.  I suppose I should look on the bright side I can send my note by pigeon. And we have them in every color now but not one god damn goat!!!...good grief is it too early to start drinking?  

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