Thursday, November 17, 2011

the day time stopped

I really don’t want to wake up.  I don’t want to get out of bed.  I turn over begrudgingly opening my eyes to read the clock 4:15 am.  Okay.  I take a breath, close my eyes, and fall back to sleep.  Fall back into the warmth of same dream.  The dream where I am in bed in the mountains in beautiful a room watching the slightly ajar door, soft orange light spilling in around it, listening to his footsteps in the hall.
Somewhere in the mass of deliciously warm covers I hear Beach gasp in her sleep.  I thought I had felt her soft flesh beside me hot- too hot.  I wake with a start.  Touch her forehead to my wrist but she is fine.  From the other side of her Colby rolls in his sleep.  I turn to check the clock 4:16 am.  I lay back down gently pushing Beach over to Colby’s side a tiny bit, then a tiny bit more, then just a hair more.  I settle in and fall back asleep, back to the same dream, watching the door.
Beach’s hand grabs my cheek.  I scramble to wake.  Between sleep and not sleep I think I need to remember to cut her nails and when did she get here anyway? Not here in bed with us but here in my dream.  I wake up.  The alarm clock is in my field of vision 4:26 am.  Are you kidding me?  A dog whines in sleep.  I close my eyes and when I open them I am again staring at the door waiting.  I blink and I am staring at the alarm clock 4:28 am.  The pattern repeats until 5:30 when I sit up in bed look around the room.  If we are all here who am I waiting for?  And I get up walk downstairs to make coffee realize I am still asleep I wake up and try it again.  I roll over look at the clock 4:15 am.
I have no idea…    

No comments:

Post a Comment